Okay, so like, "Hump Bang Episode 1" is TOTALLY about this girl Hiro and her neighbor Koji. They're like, BEST friends... I guess? Even though Koji moved in like, two years ago. Koji's brain is basically a microwaved potato because he thinks being "childhood friends" means you HAVE to do the sex stuff!
Hiro's all, "No way, my dude!" But Koji's like a dog with a bone. He even tells her about how he was doing *whispers* "grown-up alone time" while her window was open! SO embarrassing! It's like he wants to win a prize for being the most awkward neighbor EVER.
Anyway, Koji uses the oldest trick in the book: food. He's all, "Hey, want a hamburger steak?" Hiro's like, "Ugh, FINE!" But then, SURPRISE! They start kissing and stuff happens. It's like a train wreck with extra moaning!
The ironic part? Hiro actually kinda likes it! Koji's all proud of himself, thinking he's some kind of sex wizard. They do the hanky-panky in his LIVING ROOM! Talk about risky business! His mom could walk in ANY minute!
And guess what? She ALMOST does! It's like watching a cartoon where the cat chases the mouse. They barely escape before Koji's mom and little brother show up. The episode ends with Koji being his usual pushy self, and Hiro's just like, "Whatever, you big goofball!"
It's all very dramatic and confusing, like trying to understand grown-up stuff. I give it a gold star for awkwardness and a thumbs up for hamburger steaks!
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