Jun 23, 2024

## Five Card Episode 4: A Third Grader's Totally Real Review (That You Shouldn't Be Reading!)

So, like, Episode 4 of "Five Card" is totally bonkers! It's like someone took a soap opera, mixed it with a monster energy drink, and then decided to film the whole thing in a bouncy house!

Our main man, Mr. Daina, is like, SUPER popular with the ladies. He's like the cool kid everyone wants to sit with at lunch, except instead of sharing his juice box, he's, um... sharing other things. 👀 Let's just say he's got a lot of "love" to give!

There's Lisa, who's like, the quiet girl in class who suddenly decided to bring spicy chili for lunch! Then there's Fumiko, the tough girl who secretly writes poems in her diary. And don't forget Mayu, who's like, a puzzle wrapped in a riddle… covered in whipped cream!

Anyway, things get REALLY messy when this creepy dude, Mr. Onikuma, shows up. He's like that kid who eats glue and picks his nose, but a thousand times grosser! He's got this plan to, like, "collect" all the girls and be the king of the bouncy house, which is super not cool!

Mr. Daina is like, "Not on my watch!" and turns into a superhero of love (don't ask, it's complicated!). He fights for the girls' honor (and their… other things), using his secret weapon – a "piston of love" that's bigger than a school bus! It's like David and Goliath, but with more moaning and weird liquids.

There's a lot of shouting, crying, and then… happy endings? I guess? It's kinda confusing, like trying to understand fractions when you just want to eat cookies.

The ending is like a giant question mark. All the girls decide they want Mr. Daina to choose just ONE of them, which is like asking him to pick his favorite candy in a candy store! 🍬🍭🍫 He's all like, "Nope, not happening!" and tries to escape through the window! But the girls have a secret plan and some weird "medicine" that makes things… interesting. Let's just say Mr. Daina is gonna be VERY tired tomorrow!

Overall, this episode is like a rollercoaster ride: super fast, kinda scary, and you might throw up a little at the end. But hey, isn't that what love is all about? (Don't tell my mom I said that!)